Would You Like Sperm With That?
The infertility industrial complex is hard at work churning out babies at an astonishing rate via IVF, IUI, PGD, Egg Donation, PDQ, XYZ, yada, yada, yada. It’s enough to make your head spin“and your pocketbook empty. I participate in an LGBTQ parental support group, and you hear stories all the time about how much time and how much money is spent trying to make a kid.
However, what do you do when you don’t have the money for all that?
If your answer is, “Don’t have a child, please leave this blog immediately, and let the door hit you on your elitist ass on the way out.
It was with interest that I heard the story of Trent Arsenault, donorsexual. I thought his fight with the government was a noble one. After all, he was just providing a free service to the needy, right? Just don’t scratch the story too deeply, because it can quickly suck you into the swirling vortex of train wreck that’s going on around him. I gotta say though, it’s a fascinating train wreck. This could make for a great opera someday.
Nonetheless, I get a bit of a charge out of rebel sperm donation. I’ve donated sperm to friends trying to get pregnant. I even made a fun scene out of it. I dressed in my leathers and stopped by to “deliver a pizza. Not the production that my man Trent is involved with, but not your standard “go wank in this sterile vial either. I wouldn’t be accepted in any sperm bank anyway. I’m too old, and I’m diabetic with a family history of diabetes. Fuck that noise! I’ll just give it away to friends who ask! Y’all should too!
Can’t y’all just picture it? Queerspawning everywhere! We will be awash in sperm! (Okay, maybe that’s a different fantasy.) Take THAT FDA!!! We will create our own babies the way we see fit! Hi! I don’t want to fuck you, but I might like to have your sperm. Will you sign this waiver? Remember that cute friend of yours? I’m sure he makes pretty babies! Ask him for his sperm!