Ways of Celebrating “Go Fuck Yourself Day”

Regardless of whether you have a hot date on Valentine’s Night, I hope you’ll remember to romance yourself at some point during February.  After all, erotic loving isn’t just about partnered sex.  During a conversation about the importance of solo sex, my dear friend KL Pereira suggested we name February 13th Go Fuck Yourself Day.  Wow, what brilliance.  (Though of course, you can seduce yourself any day of the year!).  I for one will be dating myself in style on Feb 13th.  And why not?  Self-loving can be wonderful, enhancing our mood while helping us savour — and it’s about time we started announcing that more freely.  Below you’ll find a few possibilities for dating and/or seducing ourselves in erotic, sensual and fun ways:

Flirt with Yourself! One of the reasons dates can be exciting is because of all the anticipation “ and on a date with yourself this is just as important.  Prepare by investing in erotic luxuries you don’t plan to use in advance, and make sure your choices speak to touch, scent and/or sound as well as looks.  Example gifts for yourself include an erotic novel you want to read, a new sex toy, some special bubble bath, new lingerie or underwear, some music you love, a hot film, some delicious new lube¦  Collecting such items is part of your flirtatious build-up to the night in question — tantalize you!  (I like: The Fancy Me Sampler Kit).

Plan Ahead! To make this a wonderful evening, give it some thought beforehand.  You can book yourself a table at a relaxed eating-place (yes you can book a table for one!) or sit at the bar and enjoy a more casual experience.  Sometimes, going to a new pub or restaurant can be a lovely way of giving yourself some space.  I tend to order myself a glass of wine and take a book I’ve been itching to read, plus I put special music on my iPod.  Of course, if eating out doesn’t feel right, you don’t have to do so!  You can order take-out, cook for yourself, watch the game, or go to the cinema.  Don’t worry if it takes time to find your ideal self-date “ planning to wait until you’re ready is a good way of planning!  (I like: Anne Rice’s erotic novel The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty).

Set the Stage! Think about ways to make your home seductive on the big night, and remember “ this is an erotic date, so plan for the solo seduction!  Lay that new leather number on the bed, ready and waiting, or place your seductive lube right next to your new sex toy.  Personally, I love to come home to a box of chocolates next to the bed along with a scented candle.  (Don’t forget the matches!).  As you dress on the night itself, spend quality time with yourself.  If preening makes you feel good, do lots of it.  (I like: Lake Champlain 5 Star Bars).

On your Date! Enjoy your own company.  This is all part of the great romance.  Later, you’ll take yourself home/to your chosen venue, and bed yourself, so tap the ˜you’ you’d love to make love to (or the screw the heck out of), enjoying the sexy build-up.  If you’re staying in, it can be great to create a special mood using scents and textures.  If you go out alone, you might be surprised how many people will be inspired by your solo presence…though of course, this is all about you and you alone.  What if you’re not comfortable on the date you’ve chosen?  No big deal.  One of the great attributes of a wonderful night out is being flexible and spontaneous.  Remember the erotic film you stashed away for later tonight?  Well, it’s there waiting…  (I like: Ambiance Massage Candles).

The Seduction! Back in bed, bath, or on the couch, or wherever you end up, get ready to make love to yourself.  This may mean some scented lotion or a set of new sheets or perhaps it involves rolling around in bed for as long as you damn well wish.  Read erotica or watch porn, light those candles, play that music.  Want to tie yourself up?  You only need one handcuff!  Fancy being blindfolded?  Feed yourself strawberries!  You may find it all hilarious.  Laughter is often a big part of seduction!  Some of the best sex is giggly and liberated and fun.  (I like:  TCB Waterproof Bullet Vibrator).

Afterplay Counts! Don’t stint.  I enjoy wrapping myself up in bed while watching one of my favourite films, writing in my sex journal, or simply cuddling my bear (I love my bear) as I fall asleep.  Chocolate is often involved.  Mind you, when isn’t it? (I like: Susie Bright’s Love & Lust Sex Journal).

Oh, and by the by, if you’re on a budget, you can still have a great time.  Shards of dark chocolate in front of a seductive movie is one of my favorite romantic evenings, as is writing in a sex journal (or even creating a sex journal!) or a warm bath by candlelight with a free erotic read.   In fact, if you want some new erotica, you’re on the right site!  Why not browse through some online stories?  There are so many gems “ maybe check out the stories here at the Good Vibrations Magazine, or those at Erotica For All.  And if you feel like writing some hot romance for yourself, try taking an online erotic writing or romance writing course such as those at the Basement Writers Workshop.

By the by, I’d love to hear about any of your special self-dates and self-seductions, anonymously or otherwise.  Enjoy!

Hearts and flowers,



Good Vibrations

Good Vibrations is the premiere sex-positive, women-principled adult toy retailer in the US. An iconic brand and one of the world's first sex toy shops to focus specifically on women's pleasure and sexual education, Good Vibrations was founded by Joani Blank in 1977 to provide women with a safe, welcoming and non-judgmental place to shop for erotic toys. Good Vibrations has always included all people across the gender spectrum, and is a place where customers can come for education, high quality products, and information promoting sexual health, pleasure and empowerment. Customers can shop Good Vibrations' expertly curated product selection across any of its nine retail locations or on the GoodVibes.com website, where they can also find a wealth of information pertaining to sexual pleasure, exploration and education.

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