The Art of the Quickie

Time. There’s just not enough of it. And never has it been more scarce than when I became a Mom. Most of my time is devoted to taking care of my child, my home and my work.

For the past five years, my sex life has survived on quickies. Jay and I seized time during our kid’s afternoon naps or late at night. We mourned the days of leisurely exploring each other. Often, we play “beat the clock,” or more accurately, we play “get off before the kid wakes up.” Sometimes we win, a temporary victory until the next time; sometimes we lose, no consolation prize, just blue balls and frustration.

Needless to say, we had to adapt. Quickies, it is, but we have to make it count. We had many failures, but over time we’ve also succeeded. Let me share our successes with you.

3 Ways to Maximize a Quickie

1. Talk dirty.

Sure, I can’t be tied to our bed while being ravished by my lover while I am on-call to tend to a baby that may wake up hungry and cranky at any time, but that doesn’t mean I can’t talk about it while we’re having a quickie. Start with, “If I could I would…” or “I’d love it if you…” Fill in the blanks. The possibilities are endless.

Know what else I learned about talking dirty? There are some things that drive my lover wild but I’m not as enthusiastic about doing. For instance, just the thought of shoving his cock from my ass to my mouth makes my man rock hard. I indulge him once in a great while, but more often I just say something like, “I know you love it when you shove your cock in my mouth fresh out of my ass. I don’t think I’ll let you do it tonight, but if you’re good, I might.”

This is one of those remarkable applications of the power of suggestion. We could be indulging in purely vanilla sex while our minds are exploring the dirtiest extreme hardcore scenes we can come up with. A little roleplaying also elevates the play. Something as simple as, “No, please don’t,” can take the quickie into a mini Dominant/submissive scene. Make sure you agree on a safeword before playing. It’s amazing how quickly play escalates when time is of the essence.

2. Tease. Always.

I play a little footsie at the dinner table. I grab my man’s butt while he washes dishes. I send naughty sexts while standing in line at the post office. I’ve even sent a dirty picture I took of myself in the bathroom while my kid was in gymnastics. A few naughty emails sent while we’re both at work doesn’t hurt anyone and goes far in keeping the antici… pation of the time we will get to spend together. Technology allows us to keep in touch. So let’s.

Invest in sexy underwear. There’s no reason why I shouldn’t wear lacy panties under my jeans and sweater. It gives me a sexy secret to amuse myself with while I go about day-to-day chores. The thought that underneath my wholesome granola Mom look, I’m a femme fatale keeps me feeling sexy. What’s more, it’s a really great way to surprise my man when we…

3. Do it anywhere. Do it everywhere.
If we have time, we seize it. Remember when we were horny teens and didn’t have a place to call our own, and we had to sneak around behind our parents’ backs to get some? It’s the same thing over again, only this time we have to sneak around behind our kids’ backs.

We’ve done it in my parents’ laundry room during a family gathering. We’ve done it in the bathroom, in the kitchen, in the garage, in the backyard late at night, in closets, and in the shed. If we think we can get away with it, we give it a try. Our sex life is worth it.

Do you have any more ideas on how to make the most of a quickie? I’d love to add some more to my list. Variety is the spice of life, and when it comes to spices, a little can go a long way.

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