Shar Rednour Talks Dirty to Me

The world of porn is much like the arena of non-erotic mainstream films: mainstream porn operates and produces videos (and stars) in the same formulaic manner as does Hollywood. Just as this is true, there exists outside both worlds an exciting backlash of independent filmmakers — and for me, nothing is more exciting than film artists making their own porn. This system has unintentionally midwifed porn films that are more erotic, intimate and immediate than Silicone Valley has ever produced, and San Francisco based, dyke-run SIR Video captures this in every video they’ve released.

Their newest video Talk to Me Baby: A Lover’s Guide to Dirty Talk and Role Play is a delicious treat for couples like no other. Much like their perennial bestseller Bend Over Boyfriend, Talk to Me reinvents the sexually explicit instructional video and illustrates each pointer with a hot sex scene using real (and very attractive) couples who just can’t stop smiling, kissing, loving and making each other come. It’s almost too hot to be a sex guide, yet exactly what I’ll be recommending to customers in our stores who want to learn how to talk dirty, share fantasies and explore role-play. It’s a hot video: Get it, watch it, rewind — and share it with a lover. I managed to catch up with Shar Rednour, the video’s hot hostess and half of SIR Video to ask her a few questions about this groundbreaking sex ed film — and she had many hilarious, and insightful, answers.

Where did the idea for “Talk to Me Baby” come from?

On a personal level, I love dirty talking and role-playing. I was always a good girl growing up, didn’t smoke cigarettes, didn’t drink until I was 17 and only then in moderation (unlike the kegger-sucking teenagers). I didn’t cuss, either. So saying naughty words in the bedroom really turned me on. But I really perfected my nasty tongue when I started dating butch women who sometimes didn’t want their bodies touched in certain ways but wouldn’t mind masturbating in front of me, my words would push their orgasms over the edge. And of course get me turned on again. I soon realized that you don’t have to be dating a butch to make the most of talking dirty.

Talk to Me Baby shows how to make the most of dirty talk as a sex toy, and is a video whose time has come. I think that couples discuss non-monogamy or their fantasies of who they think is hot a lot more than people used to. Role-playing or a little dirty talk is an easy way to have 50 lovers yet remain perfectly monogamous with your partner. It’s so hot to be the waitress, the delivery boy. It’s often much hotter than actually having sex with that stranger who might look good in a uniform but sucks in bed! (No offense to waitresses or delivery boys — I know they are all great between the sheets.)

Where did the fantasies in the video come from?

Our twisted imaginations and some from our cast. Like Pony Boy and Mistress for example, that fantasy was one they really do at home. But L.P.S. (Lesbian Postal Service) is one of my favorites that Jackie and I do at home. “Rough Biker Guy and Lady Producer” was my idea. We were copying an old Joe Namath and Ann Margaret movie called C. C. Rider.

Are all of your performers amateurs?

None of our performers are professional porn actors. Some perform their art locally, like writing or dancing, but they have sex for us to a) be exhibitionist because they love showing off for us, and b) because they are in on our company’s mission statement which is to “change how people have sex for the better.” They really care and want to put their pussies and cocks where the mouths are, uh, so to speak. What I mean is, it’s easy to sit at home and complain about what porn or sex-ed is out there — it’s another thing to use your body and mind to change the status quo.

Your past films feature either boy-girl couples or lesbian/dyke combinations. What made you decide to mix it up in Talk to Me?

We see our company as having two wings, dyke entertainment and sex ed. As a sex-positive person, I’ve found that sharing advice is the best and most fun way to learn new things to try. Straight, bi and gay; men and women and trans, can each have different ways of approaching sex. Often in our inclusion we don’t ask, we just assume that we are all doing the same things at home in the sack. I like collecting those ideas and differences and sharing them. Most of us can try something the other group might do more often than we do. For instance, my gay male best friends were trying to have no ejaculation and prolong orgasm because of my lesbian Tantra stories — right about the same time I was trying TO ejaculate! Mix it up with techniques, share ideas — you might not keep that new sex position, but trying it out might be fun if you and your partner are both into it.

Did you have any strange or unusually funny moments on the set?

Oh, we always have our secret stories, like the idea we had about oiling up a couple and rolling them around on a fake bearskin rug in front of a fireplace — looks sexy but leaves our talent with icky little hairs all over their nooks and crannies! We were saying “roll more, luxuriate,” and when I said “cut” they were spitting out hairs. It was so funny. We had already let the make up artist go so Sophia had to shower but not get water on her face. Also, I just have to plug our outtakes section because you see how silly I got especially referring to my “candy cock.”

What’s next for SIR Video and Shar Rednour?

We actually have something pretty serious coming up that comes right from the foundation of our mission; we co-produced Staci Haines’ Healing Sex: The Complete Guide to Sexual Wholeness. It’s based on her book about reclaiming your body, sexuality, love and intimacy after surviving sexual abuse or trauma, The Survivor’s Guide to Sex. We wrote it together, and I directed it. It’s basically a $1000 week intensive workshop on healing from sexual abuse, in a $40 DVD. That should be out early February if not sooner. This will be our first non-sexually graphic movie. We made the film so that as many people as possible can access the information. It’s really about being whole and present. The stories within the video leave you in awe, and we’ve all learned some amazing stuff from it.

As for me, I’ve been writing more for On Our Backs lately. I’m their new Adventure Girl where I am telling all my extremely true and, I think, extremely titillating sex adventures. I am also writing a new book featuring a triad, a super hot butch/femme couple who take up with a femme girlie girl, and, um, let’s just say they have one exciting adventure after another. If anyone wants to get on my mailing list and keep up with my adventures, and SIR’s latest projects, write to me at


Good Vibrations

Good Vibrations is the premiere sex-positive, women-principled adult toy retailer in the US. An iconic brand and one of the world's first sex toy shops to focus specifically on women's pleasure and sexual education, Good Vibrations was founded by Joani Blank in 1977 to provide women with a safe, welcoming and non-judgmental place to shop for erotic toys. Good Vibrations has always included all people across the gender spectrum, and is a place where customers can come for education, high quality products, and information promoting sexual health, pleasure and empowerment. Customers can shop Good Vibrations' expertly curated product selection across any of its nine retail locations or on the website, where they can also find a wealth of information pertaining to sexual pleasure, exploration and education.

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