Overzealous Mom Gets Razor Rash

I bent over to pick up laundry while wearing my nightie so she could see what I was up to. What I had done to get her motor revved up …. She didn’t notice. Being the Laundress didn’t seem out of the ordinary. So I took it up a notch sighing, “Oh no what is this blueberry goo smashed into the carpet? It’s ruined!” That got her to look. “What?!” she said looking up finally. “Oh yeah, Baby.” And she scuttled the boys to bed right away doing her Jedi magic getting them to sleep in record time.

None of this could foreshadow what was to come. In my zeal to really seize my partner’s hormones and make her go buck wild, I dared to shave where I hadn’t carefully shaved in awhile. Our one big chance at sex in weeks and I practically ruined it with razor burn!

It’s not so much that I did shave, or um, what I shaved as how I shaved. I broke all my own rules that I had actually carefully put in books and articles.

I always tell everyone:

  1. Splurge on razors, getting the best you can afford. Hopefully a triple blade but I understand if it’s only the generic–that just means you need to GO SLOW and use 2 or 3 of them.
  2. Use Zia skincare products or something of quality to soften your hair and skin. Apply it then leave it on a few minutes before shaving.
  3. Don’t go over and over a spot. No swipey swipey, half over the same area half new area swipey. No. Instead, one good swipe, rinse. Swipe, rinse. And on and on.
  4. Go slow and pay attention to what you are doing

Well, wasn’t I Miss Have-All-the-Time-in-the-World when I wrote that?! All those tips are true. But these days, I’m a mother of three with only one bathroom, I might add. We have only one bathroom that has a shower separate and the bathtub is filled with toys even when it’s dry.

I threw my own rule book out the window. My studwife had the kids for a couple of hours wearing them out so we could have a date later. I was to have some “me time.” But me time turned into bill time, and sweeping time, and making tea time. Then I ran to the shower–not wanting to take the time to clean out the bath–deciding to really WOW her like “the old days” when being shaved up all nice, naughty and ready to go was an everyday occurrence. Good intentions.

Our “date” started out great. We both got so excited and worked up. Then the lube came out… I don’t know what I did wrong exactly since I did break… all the rules. But my pussy and bottom were on fire! Lube and friction mixed with razor burn is a bad combo, let me tell you. “Stop stop! Burning burning burning!” I cried out to Love. She was stunned for a split second. Everything had just been so great a half-moment ago, “Huh, I’ll get water? No, go. Go rinse off!” she said, pulling out of me and helping me to the bathroom. We did end up having fun anyways.  Sex is good for connection but hey those laughable First Aid moments always bring us together too.

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