No Sex For Me Please, I’m a Parent – Revisited
Recently, a long-time lover broke up with us. It was amicable. We even went out to dinner afterwards, and we still remain close friends. However, I can say that being parents, and parents of very active twin toddlers, contributed to the ending of that part of our relationship. We just couldn’t contribute the time and attention needed to sustain that level of relationship with her.
In the scheme of things, the fact that we had trouble keeping a lover because we’re parents is a White Whine of epic proportions. However, it does provide an example of the work it takes to maintain a loving, fulfilling relationship, whether it’s with your spouse(s), partner(s), or lover(s).
Now that the girls are preschoolers, they crave contact, communication, time, and energy constantly. I find it harder to make time for sex now than I did when I wrote that previous blog post.
There are several factors contributing to that. Our work schedules are a big factor. Lori works at home during the times she’s not watching the girls. I work part-time, and tend to keep watch on the twins while I’m home during the afternoon. Steven watches them at night.
Of course, that doesn’t take into count the chores we do when we’re home.
Income is another big factor. Even as a three-adult household, we don’t make enough money to afford babysitting enough to make a huge difference in our social lives.
Asking friends to watch them is a bit problematic, since frankly, they are our kids, and friends-only time is limited as well, and it’s unfair to hang our need of nookie on them. 🙂
I guess what I’m saying is that it takes a village to not only raise a child, or children, but also to sustain relationships. What I said in my previous post is still very true. Be patient with each other, and be understanding of each other.
In the meantime, we look forward to the twins getting old enough to tell them to go get a bowl of cereal and read a book while mommy and daddy stay in bed and have some “special time.