Looking for Some Tips for Self-Love?

One of the reasons some people think solo sex is boring is because they’re doing it the same way they’ve always done. Sex educator Joseph Kramer once pointed out that we don’t eat the same food at 40 as we did at 14, so why should we be doing the same kinds when we masturbate? And if you had to keep your self-pleasure a secret or do it silently in the bathroom to avoid getting caught, odds are you never learned to take your time and enjoy the ride. It’s a good thing that there are lots of ways to change that.

First, if you have a partner, do you still masturbate? A lot of people think of self-pleasuring as something that they only “need” to do when they’re single or when their partner isn’t available or as something to hide. But what if you could bring masturbation into your relationship? What if you could show your partner exactly what you like? Or what if you could have them kiss and caress you while your hands are busy? Or you could put on a show for each other? You don’t need to be on Skype with a long distance lover to do that? And you might even discover some new tricks from watching your sweetie!

Second, even if you have some favorite techniques, try something new. Many of the sex tips books and movies are full of ideas that work just fine when you’re on your own. Tickle His Pickle as some great penis handjob moves and Tickle Your Fancy will show you some fun ways to pleasure a vulva and vagina. Sex for One is the classic masturbation manual! And if you want to explore multiple orgasm techniques, starting off solo is the best way to go. Check out The Multi-Orgasmic Man for info on how to get started.

We also have lots of sex tips on our website. Take a wander through our how-to pages for some handy tips on G-spot play, anal pleasure, vibrators, prostate fun, lubricants, cock rings, and more. Nobody is born knowing anything about this stuff, so we all have to learn it somewhere. Isn’t it better to get tips from the experts than to miss out on the fun?

And if you prefer watching a video to reading a book, we have plenty on our shelves. While most of these focus on partner sex, they have a lot to offer folks who want to build their self-love skills.

So with all of these great places to get some ideas to heat up your next night at home by yourself (or with someone else), there’s no excuse for doing the same old stuff. And you might be surprised at how much fun you can have!

Dr. Charlie Glickman

Charlie Glickman is the Education Program Manager at Good Vibrations. He also writes, blogs, teaches workshops and university courses, presents at conferences, and trains sexuality educators. He’s certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, and loves geeking out about sex, relationships, sex-positivity, love and shame, communities of erotic affiliation, and sexual practices and techniques of all varieties. Follow him online, on Twitter at @charlieglickman, or on Facebook.

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