Looking For A Great Gift Idea?

Every year, we get lots of folks coming to us to get a surprise for their partner. After all, what better way is there to keep warm on a chilly evening, right? And while it’s usually a success, I’ve also seen my share of people trying to return their new toys over the days after X-mas. More often than not, it’s because the intended recipient simply wasn’t interested in what they got. So here are a few tips to improve your odds.

First, who are you buying it for? You might think that a vibrator or an anal toy or an erotic move is the perfect gift, but what do you think your partner will think? If they’ve never expressed an interest in that kind of sex, or worse, they’ve said that they don’t want to do it, there’s a good chance that you’re trying to get them to change their minds because it’s something that you want. That’s often a recipe for disaster.

In my experience, this situation can easily be avoided with a little advance work. One option is simply to ask, “I’d love to get you a sexy surprise. Is there something you’d like to try?” Or “Let’s take a look at this website and bookmark anything that looks like it might be fun.” Another possibility is to bring up the topic in a more roundabout way to gauge their interest. You could say something like, “I saw an article on a website today about how a lot of people enjoy [fill in the blank].” You’ll do better if your non-verbal language isn’t too leading in either a positive or a negative direction since your goal is to find out what your partner thinks without pressuring them one way or another.

Or you can take the direct approach and simply tell them that you’d like to try something new. Two tips- don’t bring it up during or after sex. That can easily come across as criticism and disrupt the entire experience. And be willing to try something that they want, too. After all, it’s only fair.

OK, so assuming you have an idea about what your sweetie is interested in trying (or is willing to try), how do you figure out what to get? We have lots of helpful articles about all of our different toys- how to choose them and how to use them. With almost 35 years of experience, we know what questions come up most often, so you can learn from what other people have asked.

Instead of (or in addition to) getting a toy, you could also learn some new skills to pleasure your partner! Whether you want to try G-spot play, anal fun, sex positions, oral sex, prostate play, erotic massage, or you’re just looking for inspiration, take a look at our sex tips & techniques books and our sex education movies for lots of ideas. Some of them focus on a specific technique and others are more general, so you have lots to choose from. [Hint: don’t give your partner a how-to guide unless you’ve already talked about it. It’s often taken as criticism. You’ll do better if you take the initiative on learning something new.]

Another great gift idea is to pickup a book of sexy stories and read them to each other. Or check out our body and massage goodies, or our sexy holiday gift kits, and our gifts and games. Of course, there’s always a gift card!

If you place an order of $50 or more through our website before 12/13, you’ll get free ground shipping! Can’t go wrong with that. Here are the rest of our shipping deadlines for X-mas delivery:
UPS Ground- order by 12/13 1 pm PDT
UPS 3 Day- order by 12/20 1 pm PDT
UPS 2nd Day- order by 12/21 1 pm PDT
UPS Next Day- order by 12/22 1 pm PDT

Have fun & happy holidays!

Dr. Charlie Glickman

Charlie Glickman is the Education Program Manager at Good Vibrations. He also writes, blogs, teaches workshops and university courses, presents at conferences, and trains sexuality educators. He’s certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, and loves geeking out about sex, relationships, sex-positivity, love and shame, communities of erotic affiliation, and sexual practices and techniques of all varieties. Follow him online, on Twitter at @charlieglickman, or on Facebook.

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