Juicy Valentine’s Day Ideas for the Single
Love it or hate it, reminders of Valentine’s Day are omnipresent this time of year. Marketing for this holiday starts weeks in advance, and the message is clear: This day is for the couples. But some folks aren’t partnered, and some who are don’t like the mandatory-gestures-of-affection aftertaste the holiday can give off. If you don’t want to do anything for the 14th and you’re fine with that, all is well. But if Valentine’s Day gets you down and/or you wish you had plans but you don’t, fear not! I have a bunch of fun ideas to inspire you.
1) Get out of the house and do something diverting. You could see a play, a movie, visit the animal shelter, or take a hike; whatever you enjoy that gets you out in the world, being active and engaging with life. If you like, invite a single friend, a relative, or a pal whose partner is not around for Valentine’s Day. My roommate and I are going to a Latin Valentine concert and am looking forward to over-the-top serenades.
2) Prepare a night of solo pleasures. I learned this from Regena Thomashauer in her book “Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts” and I don’t see why it should be restricted to one gender. First, clean your living space as if a special guest were coming to visit. Make sure you have pleasures available for all five senses; a little something to eat, delicious fragrances, candles glowing, good music, and pleasant things to touch (and touch yourself with). You might even invest in a new sex toy for the occasion. Then, draw a bath. Lounge in it while listening to music. Don’t listen to NPR during your Valentine’s Day bath, please. Emerge from the bath. Moisturize. Explore your body in new and different ways. Have an orgasm (or two, three) if you like, but make feeling good (rather than achieving a climax) your primary focus. Be sure to blow out those candles before you nod off.
3) Try out a new recipe, something special. How about really rich hot chocolate? None of that instant stuff. Spend a few extra bucks on real cream and good chocolate. Or make a full, multi-course dinner for one (or more; adopting Valentine’s Day orphans is a mitzvah and can add to the fun). Serve it with flare.
4) Sick of the whole idea of Valentine’s Day? Run in the opposite direction. You could ignore it completely, but why not have fun and do something completely un-Valentiney, like going bowling. Go to a monster truck rally, or play dodgeball. Host a horror movie marathon. Invite friends who feel the same way, especially the recently single. Serve chili. Or burritos. Corndogs?
5) Serve others. All throughout my childhood, my mom had me and my brother and our friends gather in early February for a marathon card-making session. On the 14th, we’d bring the cards and some homemade cupcakes to the local nursing home, where we were invariably well received. This works best with friendly, adaptable small children but I am sure there are versions that would work well for people at any stage of life. People like to be thought of, and they like a little festivity, especially if they can’t get out much. And it feels really good to spread joy, especially on a holiday that can make people feel vulnerable like Valentine’s Day does. Call your grandma. Send someone flowers anonymously who could use a pick-me-up. Feel the magic.