Is it Wrong to be Smug?

K. So today there was a parent picnic at Boo’s camp and all the regular suspects were there. Can I just say on the one hand I am delighted by the continuity on the other, seeing the same kids every year just really serves to point out how incredibly OLD I am. Seriously, some of those knee-biters are practically taller than me at this point. They’re having relationships fer chrissakes! Which brings us to my initial point of “sure-I’m-going-to-hell” boasting: namely number of parental types who sought me out to inform me that their child (usually of the boy variety) has a crush on Boo/says Boo is his girlfriend/really loves my child! = 4 sets! Of course, I know this.

Of course, when one is parenting a Boo one must expect these parents to seek to secure their child’s future happiness by somehow maneuvering them to the front of the “must-have-a-Boo-in-my-life” pack by mentioning (in a laughing way, always with a smile…) that their son says that “Boo and he are boyfriend and girlfriend!” and then (surprise!) the, “Ha! Kids. What will they think of next! [chuckle] so… has Boo ever said anything…??????”

Get in line folks. All I can say is that of course, it’s her decision who she likes but I would suggest you have your references handy! Besides which, Boo already has two girls who she “loves (Rebecca and Aiesha) [note: none of the children’s names used in this post are real and even if they are — so! What’re you gonna do about it??] and so there’s really only the couple of spaces left in her entourage. Boys who are fighting for prime positioning would include:

¢ Daniel – Surfer dude, super jock kid who’s pretty much always in charge of whatever game is being played. This may be because he knows all the rules really well or it may be because he somehow always owns the ball.

¢ Chris – Loner type whose parents are misplaced New Yorkers. Young C. has decided that he doesn’t like girls but he does likes Boo. Two major points in his favor would be that 1) he’s got one of the coolest moms I’ve ever met — cool in a very New York kind of “big emotions!” way and 2) he has not washed his hair since camp started three weeks ago.

¢ Johnny – Young rock star type. Seriously sweet. Across the board beautiful (like in a Boy Bratz doll, clear green eyes, dirty blond hair and long curling eyelashes kind of way) a bit “slow” for Boo’s tastes but good to have on board if you’re looking for someone who could really care less that “dinosaurs aren’t cool anymore!”

¢ Houston – Very cool kid with very cool parents. Kind of like a young polititian without the smarm, just generally set.

Boo, of course, has gone on record noting that she has a “crush” on some kid named Jake whom I haven’t really gotten to know all that well but whose Dad seems nice enough in a big friendly bear kind of way. And she doesn’t even really play with Jake. She plays with Johnny although sometimes I think it’s because he’s part of a package deal that includes Rebecca. It’s all so confusing… Plus, have I mentioned that they’re only in the third grade?????? Anyway. I’m probably just as bad as the rest of the parental types but it is weirdly gratifying to have my kid be the one the parents want their kids to play with. Again, I take no credit for any of it. I’m just pointing it out…

— Chick


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