Happy Vibrators on Valentine’s Day
I got married on Valentine’s Day in 1996. When I say married, I mean we had a “fierce queer true love union” because as a lesbian, I am not legally able to marry the mother of my children. It’s illegal. I like being an outlaw — it sounds rather Johnny Cash and a little sexy — but when it comes to paying taxes, signing DNR’s, being on an emergency contact list, or fully protecting our children, I don’t appreciate the State or the Federal Government dictating who I am legally able to be committed to. Not sexy.
In true outlaw style, we tattooed each other’s names on our ring fingers and had a big pot luck wedding at one of our favorite bars in San Francisco.
Friends and family made cakes, brought oysters, flowers, decorated, played music, bought us a few nights in a fancy hotel in town for our wedding night, and showered us with love and protection charms. We didn’t want to be exclusive with our outlaw love. We wanted to share it with the community, our community. We invited everyone and told them to either come single, come coupled, tripled, or in a group — but on that day they had to come before they came. As in, they had to show up in a post orgasmic blissful state and share their energy with us.
I think a few relationships got started that night. We instructed folks on the invite that this wasn’t about partnering, this was about sharing the love. Grab your vibrator and love yourself and share that energy with all.
Kundalini yoga talks about the second chakra, the sex chakra or sacral chakra that holds our sexual and creative power. Releasing the energy positively in this area of your body is good for you. Google it, I am no yoga expert but there’s lots that other cultures can teach us especially ancient ones. Especially if that area of your body has suffered past abuse or trauma. Release it.
Valentine’s Day is not about finding the perfect mate or having the perfect date or celebrating exclusivity.
Valentine’s Day is about publicly announcing that love matters, sexual health matters, community matters, friends matter, and that sexual energy can be a creative force of good for overall well-being, healing, and empowerment.
Orgasms are powerful medicine and vibrators can help you feel good faster than any anti-depressant will. Pleasure is your birthright!