Coupla things that are different this time around…
— I’m getting better at asking for stuff (aka delivering suggestions of a “So, you wanna make my toes curl…?” kind of nature.)
–I’m getting better at being clear (e.g. “Please, do not put your fingers in my ears. I know you think it’s cute and that you want to explore all my crevices but that kind of poking reminds me of the kids and I’m trying to keep the two ideas separate right this second.)
— I’m getting better about not pushing everything and everyone around so I can spend time with the new person thereby ignoring key factors in my life like SLEEP “ although I do still need to work a bit in this area because try as I might I can’t NOT feel guilty about the “I love it when I see you but it’s so fleeting¦! statements.
— I’m getting better at starting the “So, what are your thoughts about non-monogamy” conversation but not so great at finishing it.
Can’t say for sure if any of this new way of being is going to pan out in an ultimately positive way but it feels like a good start… :-]