Ask the Doctors: What’s the Best Harness?

What strap on harness is best for the wearer in terms of getting off while doing her partner ?

It depends on what sorts of things feel good to you.

For example, some people like the one-strap harnesses like the Simply Sexy Leather Harness (picture to the left). These fit like a g-string, with one strap between the legs. While they don’t make it easy to be on the receiving end of penetration, lots of people like the way that the strap rubs against the clitoris. This design is also the easiest to control because it holds the dildo very firmly to the hips.

However, that kind of friction can lead to urinary tract infections for some people, especially since the leather is hard to get 100% clean. And if you don’t like the way the seam on a tight pair of jeans feels, you might not find these too comfortable.

Two-strap harnesses like the Annie-O Harness Black (shown to the right) have two strap that go around the back of each leg. Since the straps split, they make it easy for the harness wearer to be on the receiving end of direct stimulation, whether that’s penetration, clitoral stimulation (like oral sex or a vibrator) or anal play.

The trick with these harnesses is that they can take a bit more practice to use because anytime you change the angle of you hip, the straps might need to be tightened or loosened.

Another option is to check out the Velvet Harness. There’s a small pouch in the pad that holds a tiny vibrator. The vibe runs on 3 watch batteries and is pretty quiet, especially after it’s in the pouch. But it’s powerful for its size, so if you like vibrators that’s a great option.

If you like G-spot play, try the Smartballs. Inside these elastomer-coated balls, there’s a small marble that rolls around. The neck between the balls is very flexible and the string is also coated, making it easy to use and clean. You insert both of them and as you move your hips, the inner marble moves back and forth, giving you hands-free G-spot sensations. They’re super easy to use with any harness.

There are some other possibilities, like using the We-Vibe for G-spot and clitoral vibration while wearing  a harness, using a butt plug (if you like anal play), or one of our vibrators. The Club Vibe picks up on sound levels, so the more noise you and your partner make, the stronger the vibration. So you have plenty of options.

I hope this helps. Have fun!


We’re dedicated to getting you the information you need about sex, pleasure and your health. If you have any questions, please email our staff experts, Dr. Carol Queen and Dr. Charlie Glickman, at education@goodvibes.com! For product-related questions, please email or call our customer service staff at customerservice@goodvibes.com.

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Dr. Charlie Glickman

Charlie Glickman is the Education Program Manager at Good Vibrations. He also writes, blogs, teaches workshops and university courses, presents at conferences, and trains sexuality educators. He’s certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, and loves geeking out about sex, relationships, sex-positivity, love and shame, communities of erotic affiliation, and sexual practices and techniques of all varieties. Follow him online, on Twitter at @charlieglickman, or on Facebook.

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