“Come on, everybody: Talk about consent––what it is, how you recognize it, how it affects your sex life, how its absence affects things. What’s enthusiastic consent? How do people who aren’t given the right to a full sexuality even get to enthusiasm?”
CatalystCon West 2014 just came to an end and the highlight of my conference weekend was moderating the Club 90 reunion and Closing Keynote Address with the lovely and illustrious Veronica Vera, Veronica Hart...
“Sex is a natural urge, sure, but that doesn’t mean we instinctually know how to do it. Hunger doesn’t teach us how to cook a meal. Same idea. With food, imagine if you never, ever, ever saw someone eat. You’d have to figure it out for yourself, sure, but how wonderful it would be to take a cooking class!”
“If anyone, no matter how sexually frisky and happy they are, tries to use the notion of sex-positivity to judge someone else’s sexual orientation, gender expression, sexual choices, or sexual response, they are not behaving in a sex-positive fashion. Period.”
“[E]specially in the US, …people who have tried out marriage, the holy grail of couplehood, and didn’t like it try it again. Instead of changing the way we relate, we think we just have to change the spouse… Maybe if we could think beyond the couple, many marriages could continue to function because spouses could meet some of their needs with other people.”